Revelation
21:4 “ ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no
more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has
passed away.”
April 5, 2015: “This early Easter morning
we said "Goodbye for now but not forever" to my dad. I know he is
celebrating with Jesus this Resurrection Sunday, and our family is gathered
together in remembering an amazing father, husband, and grandfather. He will be
missed, but we are praising God for his grace and peace during this time. He is
faithful, and my family is an amazing reflection of that faithfulness. I am so
thankful for this time with him. After a 9 month battle with cancer, he got a
new body this morning. Praise God for the hope we can have only in Jesus our
Savior! I will miss you, Dad!”
It was the Saturday night
before Easter Sunday. The six of
us kids, my mom, and many other family members gathered around my father’s
bedside. My brothers took turns
telling Dad some of their favorite memories from their childhood. We were all together… just being
present together. We gathered
around a man who loved God and loved his family and honored them both with his
life.
As the evening drew to a
close and the hour was late, many went home to go to bed. I know each of my brothers left reluctantly,
but they had a family to return to.
We all headed to bed, and my sister and the night-nurse took up their
evening watch over Dad, trying to keep him as comfortable as possible.
Around 4 in the morning, his
breathing took a turn for the worse.
It became evident that the end was drawing near. That early Easter Sunday morning, my
Mom and my two sisters and I gathered around his bedside, holding his hands as
he took his final breath here on earth.
It was 4:30 am, and later the pastor would point out that it was the
women in his life that surrounded him… and it was an image of the women in
Jesus’ life who first discovered His empty tomb (John 20)
The tears were shed, but for
two very opposite reasons. We
cried and mourned in sorrow as we said goodbye, but we also cried tears of joy
knowing that this was the way he would have wanted to go. He was ushered into heaven the very day
we remember and celebrate Christ’s resurrection and conquering of death. What a glorious morning so many years
ago… and what a glorious morning for my Dad last year on Resurrection Sunday
morning. He saw the face of Jesus,
and we cannot be sad for him any longer.
But, we are sad. Sorrow is still cutting. Tears still fall. Hearts are still broken. Because here on earth, we do not yet experience
the full beauty of heaven. We wait
expectantly for that joyous day, but in the present, our human bodies and
emotions still grieve the loss of a beloved husband, father, brother, and
grandfather.
April 5, 2016:
Fast forward one year to this
morning; around 4:00 in the morning, my pregnant bladder wouldn’t let me sleep
any longer. Then, my busy brain wouldn’t
turn off. I resolved to make this "awake" time productive, so I turned to my “to do” list. (Mind you... this is not a normal routine for me... I usually would just toss and turn until I fall back asleep) I slipped out of bed and into the kitchen. A few light housekeeping chores could be completed until I
was ready to go back to bed. I
started with emptying the clean dishes out of the dishwasher. I moved on to making the guest bed with
the freshly washed sheets that I did not have the energy to tidy up last night.
I made my way back into the
kitchen and saw a cantaloupe on the counter. I had purchased it yesterday at the grocery store, but that
is not my regular “go-to” fruit.
But, it was on sale and it looked good to me, so I bought it.
As I stood there in my
kitchen, I thought “I’ll just cut this up and it will be ready to eat tomorrow
and in the coming week.” As I
sliced through the sweet fruit, a flood of memories about my dad came to
mind. Now, I don’t know why, but
melon always reminds me of my dad.
Maybe because it was one of the fruits I remember him prepping in our
kitchen growing up. Maybe its because
he loved to eat it. I’m sure my
mom cut up melon in the past too, but for some reason I only remember Dad doing
it. As I cut it up, I reflected on
Dad. Then I remembered the
date. Then I looked at the time:
4:30 am. Then I just smiled and
thanked God for this sweet moment to reflect on happy memories with my dad. I have not lived at home near my family
in Indiana since 2002, so my time spent with them is limited to a few weeks out
of a year. My day-to-day life
doesn’t bring me face-to-face with my hometown or people I grew up with. Therefore, I know my siblings
experience far many more daily reminders of Dad and his absence in their lives than I
do. But, early this morning, God
gave me the gift of a simple memory of my Dad. I will cherish it, and imagine my baby boy sitting on his
grandpa’s lap as they enjoy the indescribable beauty of heaven and God’s face. Maybe Dad is sharing a slice of melon
with his grandson Dakota… and one day I will have the pleasure of joining them.
1 Peter 1:3-9
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy
he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus
Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or
fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are
shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be
revealed in the last time. In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a
little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These
have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than
gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory
and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love
him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled
with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of
your faith, the salvation of your souls.”
